You wrote a screenplay. Great! Now what?
Finishing your first screenplay is huge accomplishment. Writing is one of the hardest things to do, especially when no is paying you to do it. You might have written your film for any number of reasons. You could be an actor trying to create their own work (been there). You could be an expert in a given field and have always wanted to turn that expertise into an exciting story. You could just love writing (huh?). Regardless, no matter the specific reason, the overarching drive to write a screenplay is probably because you, like me, love the movies. I could have said cinema but I didn't want to sound pretentious.
The trouble is, now that you've written your script, how do you know if it's accomplishing it's goal - effective story telling. Notice how I didn't say how do you know if it's good. That's because I hate using words like good or bad to describe someone's writing. Writing is a process. I'm actually not a frustrated writer who never "made it" (I'm a frustrated actor, totally different). I'm not in the business of tearing someone's writing down and I'm not here to tell you if your script is good or not. Good and bad are personal opinions and telling someone their script is good or bad is not very helpful. If I don't like Westerns (who are we kidding, I love Westerns) and you send me a Western, do I react by saying, A Western! Nobody wants to see that! Of course not. That would be preposterous. And if my consultation amounts to nothing more that, "This script is good," that's just as unhelpful.
What I do instead when I consult on a screenplay, is help you build onto the foundation you have already laid.
I do not try and make your film something it isn't just to squeeze it into my idea of what's good. I try to make your movie more YOUR movie. The movie you want to see up on that big-ass screen.
Yeah, but what exactly is a script consultant smart guy?
I'm glad you asked.
What is a Script Consultant (see what I did there).
A script consultant is someone who reads your script and gives notes to help make your screenplay more. More what? More of what you intend it to be. More dramatic, more exciting, more mysterious, more horrific, more action-packed, more suspenseful, more humorous, etcetera, etcetera. I also want to help you make it more cinematic. For example, if I think a scene would benefit from more movement or a different setting I will say so.
I also want to encourage you to keep going. It's hard enough finish a first draft. However, to quote an old phrase, writing is rewriting. It was said that Tennessee Williams wrote more drafts of A Streetcar Named Desire than there were copies in print. Even the best screenwriters know that their screenplay is a living thing. It will change and grow - maybe shrink (I was in the pool!). Even when your screenplay gets produced and starts filming it will change. Locations, lines, action - they are all up on the chopping block. That's not always a bad thing. The famous ice-skating rink date scene from Rocky where he and Adrienne are shuffling around in an empty ice-skating rink, came about because they couldn't afford to shoot in a restaurant where Stallone originally set it. I can't imagine that scene being more romantic and ultimately iconic, and it came about because of that change.
So be aware that your script will and should change and grow. Many people involved in the making of your movie, actors, the director and even the gaffer will have a lot of input and sometimes that input is fantastic. For instance, at the end of Blade Runner, Rutger Hauer didn't like his dying monologue. So he rewrote it that day and it was beautiful. And the writer still got all the credit so win-win. Get used to the fact (and it is a fact) that your screenplay isn't finished until the movie is in the can.
But what do I get for my money?
Simply put, you get a lot of notes (is a butt-load an accurate estimate) which you can ask me any questions about in order to maximize clarity. I will sit and read your screenplay (usually twice) and make copious notes that hopefully work as a roadmap to a more realized work.
I make sure to break up my notes into the following topics:
1. Dialogue Are you able to write the way people talk? It's not as easy as you might think. Sometimes as writer we find ourselves writing what WE want to say and not what our character should be saying. There are techniques to learn how to improve your dialogue writing. One is to listen to people in public. All kinds of people. That's if they can stop staring at their phones long enough to string a sentence together. And two, to say the lines out loud and see if they sound like a person talking. I will give you suggestions on how to improve dialogue within a given scene and I will also help to rework entire scenes if the dialogue doesn't seem to be saying what you want the scene to say.
2. Structure What is a movie? It's a story. And stories are not laid out willy nilly. The events in a story are placed in such a way that the listener is able to follow the story and is excited by where the story is going. If the story is told well, then the ending of the story is a real pay off. We bring our audience to an emotional climax and they are grateful. However, if the story doesn't move in a certain way, the story can be ruined. That's structure. It's not just about beginning, middle and end (watch Memento or Pulp Fiction). And it's also not about acts, i.e. act one, act two and so on. It's about making sure the elements in your story become a path to a specific destination. If you are climbing a mountain trail and finally reach the peak and suddenly, plop, you step into a swamp, you would be mighty confused (and I imagine, pretty pissed). I write structure notes to try and make sure that when your audience finally reaches the top of that mountain, they see the view above trees.
3. Reader's Perspective Now I'm assuming when you wrote this screenplay, you wanted to get it into the hands of people in the industry - producers, directors, Brad Pitt. Great! You should. One thing you want to make sure of though, is that when Brad reads your screenplay, there is nothing clunky that might distract him from the action. These aren't necessarily mistakes, they might just be a moment when you took something for granted. For instance, your hero might be walking down the street and out of nowhere start talking to someone. You as the writer know that he's talking to his wife on the phone and in context, that might become clear as we read. However, the reader might just think, "Who the heck is this guy talking to?" That's when you get a note saying, "Make sure to say that hero calls wife on cellphone. She answers." It's little things like that can throw a wrench in the works.
4. Action A lot of times the characters in your film might actually be doing something physical instead of just sitting and talking. Crazy, I know. Notes on action are present when the action and the character don't come together in an organic fashion. Sometimes we have our characters doing something violent when violence isn't called for. Or a detective might pick something up at a crime scene without gloves or a novice skate boarder might execute a perfect Fakie to Fakie 900 thereby destroying any chance at verisimilitude.
5. Character Development Characters are usually people, sometimes dogs and occasionally chimps (but never cats...never). People tend to be complicated (dogs not so much, chimps even less so). To quote the famous poet Shrek, people are like onions, smelly...wait, that was Donkey. Regardless, you want the people in your films to be as people-like as possible. If I notice that someone in your film is merely reacting to the protagonist instead of living their own life, I'll point it out. Characters have to have a life outside of the scene. They are not like our first grade teachers who slept at the school and lived only to impart knowledge to growing minds. No no...they are complex human beings with entire lives. Not that you have to know every detail about every character's life (you should about your main characters though), you just have to write them as if you do. Characters who are merely there to facilitate a plot point are not very interesting. Also, if one of your leads behave in a way that isn't organic, believable or interesting within the moment, notes will happen.
6. Typo, Continuity and General Notes I grouped these three together because they don't need much of an explanation. Here's a long explanation proving my point. We all know what a tyop is...I mean tpyo...um, what a typo is. And lucky for you, I'm really good at spotting them (if you disregard the previous sentence). A Continuity note happens when a character does something that contradicts, repeats or just doesn't jibe with something that happened earlier in the film. For instance, if Big Joe gets whacked in the second scene and then shows up in the courtroom to testify, I'll be letting you know. Lastly a General note is just how it sounds; a note that isn't related to any of the above mentioned topics. It's just, ya know, general.
Here is an example of notes I recently gave on a feature written my writer/actor/director Stacy Thunes.
p. 12 – D – J.J.: "Because you’re bloody miserable, Beth — and no one else is going to fix that."
Change to: "Because your bloody marriage is making you miserable, Beth – And no one else is going to fix that."
p. 30 – A/S – Instead of having this convo in the restaurant, have J.J. and Beth walking down the street towards the restaurant (cut Keith till later in scene) and at the end of J.J.’s line, "…and you’ll be home before bonehead even notices you’re gone" – cut to – "Christ on a bike, will you look at that."
Then: Beth and J.J. see the crowd outside the restaurant, Cinnamon is across the way or in the crowd or in the restaurant with hat and sunglasses. As Beth and J.J. get to the crowd then we hear Keith saying that he can’t seat everyone at once he’s short staffed.
Then: keep p. 32 Beth: "I can’t do this" - to J.J.: "Yeah, but- oh, never mind. Too late for all that now. I’m right behind you."
Then: Keep Tony and J.J. lines as is until J.J. says, "The manager’s asked us to take it out to the car park, all right? We’ve got a slightly bigger crowd than we’d anticipated." Keith can then say: "You’re Elke, well I’m Antelopee, take this crowd to the car park." Keep rest as is. I just think that moving the scene outside will add more movement and action.
p. 38 – D – Cinnamon: "Funny — cleaners from L.I.N.T. lecturing me on ethics. How I love a good double standard."
Change to: "Funny — cleaners from L.I.N.T. lecturing me about rubbish. Finally, a topic you actually know something about."
p. 43 – G – at the end of the Beth/Jake scene maybe Jake apologizes for calling her a stupid cow. Not sure if that aligns with your intention for the scene.
p. 51 – A – Ian: "I’ll come back for the tellies. You clearly don’t want ‘em."
Maybe instead - direction: Ian unplugs the television and carries to the door. As he’s walking – “I’ll just take this. You clearly don’t want it.” And instead of her attacking the television she can either stare at where it was and sigh in relief or exhaustion after Ian leaves OR she can grab the cord as Ian leaves and yanks it out of his hands smashing it on the floor leaving his stunned. And if he protests she can say that she paid for the damned TV. It all depends on the mood you’re going for.